The key to change is to let go of fear.

Change. Such a small word with such a large meaning. Change. Something that is good, but scares me witless. I've never been good at coping with change. At least not at first. I'm dealing with so much change right now, that I honestly don't know what to do with it all. Some of this change is wonderful. Some of the change makes me want to cry.

My dad, step mom, brother, and sister, and soon to be sister all just moved to Mississippi. I'm really going to miss them. I've only lived near them for year and now I have to give them up. It sucks. However, due to the move, my best friend and I are getting to live in their house. It's so scary and exciting all at the same time.

The other big thing that's changing are my friendships. I know that people drift and grow apart, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. I was looking at my facebook friends the other day and seeing all of my high school best friends that I never even talk to. I loved every last one of them and still do. I want to be able to pin point the time when we started drifting apart, because that's the kind of person I am. There's no way. It's a slow process that you don't realize is happening until it's done. On the other side of that, I have my friends that I still feel are my best friends... even though we don't talk often. How weird is that? I don't talk to some people and I feel as though the friendship is gone, but I don't talk to other people and I know that we're still best friends. I know that we'll still run and tackle each other with hugs the next time we see each other.

The one big thing that saddens me is that I can look at all of my high school friends and for each of them I can say "You changed my life." In some way or another each one of them did and I can pinpoint exactly what they did that changed my life. It makes you wonder... What have I done with my life? How have I affected my friends? Have I been a good influence? Have I changed their lives? Part of me hopes that I have. I hope that I've changed their lives as much as they've changed mine.

To all of my friends of the past and present: You have changed my life. Every last one of you. I love you. Thank you for making me the person that I am today... I hope that I'm someone you'd be proud of.

Always,